08 September 2011

surviving my own rollercoaster

I think my emotional regulator is broken.

Since getting back from Scotland, whatever the emotion it's been dramatic. When I'm happy I'm blissfully cheery. When I'm sad I'm devastated. When I'm worried I'm panicking and woeful. Even my calm has been perfectly peaceful. And all that can be in the one day. It's doing my head in.

Perhaps it's all the change and unsettledness of my current situation. The abrupt loss of my job, the high of my wonderful Scotland adventure (mingled with necessary preparations for my return), moving out the day I got back and in with a guy I don't know very well that I find a bit of an odd experience and being a state of limbo, even now with having a new job but having to wait three weeks for it to start. That's a lot of change--sudden and unprepared for. Especially when I'm the kind of person that takes time to adjust. Perhaps that's why I've been wildly emotional. It would make sense.

Maybe I just need to hang on and ride it out.


Anonymous said...

Praying for you as you "hang on"


kelgell said...

Thanks. As soon as I realised what was going on I think I plateaued again. All's good on that front.